December 14, 2010

Aint it funny....


It was a cozy small cafe, wooden walls, retro ambience, and some slow rock of 80’s on the player. There was not much of crowd in the beginning of the day. I was enjoying freshly brewed coffee with a work friend. She works in the adjacent building to mine. The wind was blowing cold. We were laughing at the usual office gossip.

She had recently divorced her abusive husband and seemed quite happy with her painstaking decision. I, on the other hand was planning, shopping for my marriage, to an unknown man, a complete stranger, who my family had decided. This man was an IT professional working in the US and came from an affluent family of my native village, I was told. I was candidly happy to get married to that man. I innocently thought and dreamt about my soul partner, or so I thought.

Suddenly, a loud conversation attracted my attention. It was a man, in the adjacent couch.

He was talking to someone probably his colleague. They were engrossed in a serious conversation. He was casually dressed, in a crisp beige shirt and smart denim jeans. I generally don’t look at anyone twice. And when it’s a man, I would not look at him. This was what I was thought from childhood, not to look at boys or men. But his distinct features that were making me melt. His hair was curly and jet-black, falling just above his shoulder, his eyes glassy and mysterious. He was mind-blowing. I saw him and for a second and I stopped breathing.

His lips were voluptuous, pure and soft. I could not help, drooling at him. His eyes, there was a passageway to his soul.

I felt my heart racing, an adrenalin rush, and an instant yearning in the pit of my stomach. I felt uneasy and vulnerable. I didn’t know this man and he didn’t know me yet I felt I knew him well and he knew me too.

But then I didn’t fail to notice, that his attention was also distracted from his conversation. He looked straight at me. In his glassy blue eyes, I could feel a sense of familiarity and anxiety. His gaze felt like a sharp weapon, piercing through my heart in one vicious blow. A smile beamed across his extremely handsome face. He was caught in mid sentence, for he too had lost his train of thought. He drooled at me, as if we were lovers.

His soul knew me. I was confused. I thought I was in love with my fiancé, but this mans energy, destroyed all. It was strange. The sensation that this man created in me, forced me to question my future.

Was I going to get married to my soul partner? The right one? If he was the right one, why am I so puzzled?

Or this one is love at first sight? I have argued with a lot of my friends that it was crap.

As a practical girl, not to be reckoned with I severed eye contact yet; I have to accept that I am a dreamer with my head lost in the heavens. I bid farewell to my friend and made my way out to the car.

A voice deep inside me screamed. You must not marry!

His thoughts were running through my mind, I couldn’t ignore. I decided to come over for the coffee, the next day, same place, same time.

"Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny...
And you can't move on even though you try...
Ain't it strange when you're feeling things you shouldn't feel...
Oh, I wish this could be real..."


Jenefer Lopez was running in my mind

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